She proclaimed “you can’t kill someone who is already dead”!!!
To forgive…to forget…to be strong…to be patient..to stop worrying…those were the words that haunted her the most. The shallow minded words glazed with sympathy. That wasn’t what she needed. She did forgive and forget. She remained patient until she bled from those invisible scars of torturous life. She was the epitome of strength and patience. To realise her dreams torn apart, to be inflicted with those stabbing words, to be looked down upon, to see the ego and selfishness of the one who should have stood by her but appreciated the other and crushed her dreams and life beneath the feet of arrogance. To know those efforts getting shattered and the tiny broken sharp pieces of those, piercing right through her… The moment of despair spreading through the agonised eyes watching the anguish of the demons surrounding her and standing helplessly, to let go off, the only one who loved her, scum to the stab by the dagger of evilness. Moments of silence with just the tears trickling down to feed herself for that was her staple, to keep her living through, with strength. Every time, she had to pay for the hauteur of the ones around her, she stood calm, unshaken by the adversities that really caused scars irreparable within her. Her strength was mistaken, for none knew her vulnerability which she hid within. As she stood receiving the spears aimed at her with poise, with those smiles hiding the wails that shrieked within her heart unnoticed by anyone the eyes glimmering with the tears that she withheld not to let herself down.
In a world of bogus people who dramatically convinced fulfilling their needs, selflessness was a curse, she realised, though she could never be like those around her making her realise she is the odd person out. To be humiliated and embarrassed only for the reason she couldn’t let go of the goodness that still lay buried deep within her was seen as a weakness and pitied upon.
The dark days & nights alike spent in dungeon of mortification for believing in the constitution of relationships and conservatism she was fed with from childhood crowned her with thorns rupturing her innocence and soul leaving her alive yet dead.